Difficult topics make the best stories

Really, they do. At least, with my sadistically poetic muse, they do. For example: The End Is Where We Start From, my latest Sanctuary fic.

I wouldn't read the following if you haven't read the first chapter of the story, or you don't plan on reading it. The fic is rated "M" for good reasons: violence, sexual situations, and language.


Helen dies. Nikola is upset and angry and suicidal. And yet, in the midst of all this pain and suffering, my muse decides that there is quite a bit of beauty. I love her. And I hate her. But mostly I love her right now, because she's being nice and giving me something to write about.

Of course, this comes at the price of writing the death of beloved character(s), completely messed up sleep schedules, and sobbing as silently as possible at two in the morning so I don't wake the family.

Character death, however, is apparently one of my favourite difficult topics. I seem to have a penchant for characters who killed themselves when loved ones die. Look at FLW as well as "The End...". Look at my original fiction: My first short story involved death, and the short story I like most at the moment involves infanticide. Something in me just cries out to talk about death -- in the most beautiful way. I don't begin to understand it.

But then, my music is sadistically poetic, after all.

Four Years

So, I was looking at my ff.net profile to prove something to my boyfriend, and I realised that I've been on ff.net for four years to the day. It's kind of incredible. It's kind of timely, in a way, for me to return to fanfiction when I did, so that I'd be calmly resting in the waters of familiarity when I realised that it's been four years.

Wow. Four years. I've come so far since then, as anyone can tell who looks at my really old fiction. When you look at shameless self-inserts like TTLT, or disorganised rambles about irrelevant topics like What-Ifs, you can see how my immaturity was what I liked writing about. And now, especially when you look at "The End Is Where We Start From" (Let's see... TEIWWSF... okay, wow, that looks weird), you can tell that I've really grown up a lot since then.

I like having ff.net at my disposal. I'm glad I managed to stick with this silly thing I discovered with the help of a friend close to six years ago. I'm glad that I've been comfortable enough to keep up my messing with other people's characters in order to develop my writing skill, and that, in turn, has led me to working on my own original stuff. Also, gathering the courage to post fanfiction led me to gathering the courage to post original fiction, and with both of them getting better as I go along, I find that reading reviews of my work is why I keep writing -- and posting. Because I know that, somewhere out there, there are people crazy enough to enjoy my writing as much as I do.

Irene

Any of you with vague knowledge of... well, I guess really it would be weather patterns but I'm sure it's made news elsewhere should have a good sense of the fact that I'm not talking about a person. I'm talking about a hurricane, which is making it all the way up the eastern seaboard, with a direct path over Philadelphia (which is where I live).

I mean, what the heck?! Hurricanes don't make it this far north! Come on, I don't want to have a tree fall down on my house! In fact I don't really want to have one fall down anywhere in my vicinity, but my neighbourhood is full of big, old trees and I can almost guarantee that one of them is going to fall. I do love power outages, but not on Teslen day! Not when I'm trying to enjoy one of my favourite ships! Not when I don't really have time for another excuse to keep me from working on my schoolwork!

Anyway, if I disappear off the face of the Earth for a few days, I've probably just lost internet. I'll survive. Let's cross our fingers, knock on wood, and throw salt over our left shoulders to ensure that my computer doesn't get fried in any power surges with the electricity going out. I'm sure it'll be fine.

I hope.

Hey, Muse! Choose more appropriate times!

My muse has a PENCHANT for arriving at like, the worst possible time. I mean, granted, being as stuck in fanfiction as I am right now isn't very helpful in getting my summer work done before I go back to school. But still, even if that were my only, problem, my muse particularly likes to arrive at one in the morning when I'm trying to fall asleep.


So, naturally, when I was trying to fall asleep this morning, I was struck with an awful and heart-wrenching idea that I couldn't put out of my head until later, and I promptly spent three hours writing a Teslen fanfic that had me sobbing by the time I finished it. It's also my first foray into writing anything that has to be rated M. It's violent. It made me sob and now is making me mad, as I keep going with it. It started when I took a prompt for Teslen day (the 27th) from the GW forums and ran in a direction that I can guarantee no one was expecting.

It's getting long. It's looking to be at least three parts. Its working title is "Feeding". It came from a challenge that was supposed to be to write about Nikola's bloodlust at some point that Helen helped him with it, and it drastically and darkly degraded from there.

Okay seriously, what is with my inability to wake up properly?

This morning I woke up at about half seven after getting only six hours of sleep (yay fanfiction! :P). When I managed to get back to sleep, I had a really weird dream which my subconscious told me was about Stargate which doesn't make any sense because the extent of my experience with it is that my boyfriend yesterday told me he likes it. Oh, and Amanda Tapping, of course, but that's not really a helpful connection either. Anyway, in my dream, I was this semi-key person who was going around doing stuff, who had just previously been confusing me (the viewer) who had told me (the character) that I (the viewer) would have to pause a lot because the medical stuff they were discussing usually went way over my head so I had to take a step back and thing until I got it. Oh, yeah, and apparently (according to my subconscious) Stargate is about vampires.

Yeah, right, okay, that makes sense. And then I woke up and was fighting with my mum and I had slept the entire day away... and then I actually woke up.


And this is coming a few days on the heels of my weird semi-lucid half-awake confusion over whether I was Helen Magnus, Nikola Tesla, or myself.

Toasts

I'm not talking about the slightly-burnt bread. I'm not really talking about what you do with alcoholic beverages, either. I'm really talking about a new collection of one-shots which I started posting yesterday, for the Sanctuary fandom.

Toasts is, IMHO, a fun collection looking at the development of the relationship between Helen and Nikola. First off, you should know that I am a HUGE Teslen shipper and a major Tesla fan in general. I love him. He's arrogant and sexy and brilliant, and Helen is utterly perfect for him.

Okay, so, I know the first two in the series haven't been too terribly shippy. I was trying to stay true to canon, and where the stories lead me while staying in that wasn't to their professing their love for one another. Oh well. The next one should be good -- with a title like "Toast of Love", what else would you expect? :D

Does anyone else think it's funny that sometimes story ideas run away with you? First this was going to be a simple one-shot, and then two, and then three, and then five, and then four, and now I think I'm back to five again but one of them will end up really smutty if I keep the current title which didn't seem as bad the first time. Oh well. Fun stuff ahead!

About Me

My name is Lucy. You may or may not know me under another name. My many personas include thecolouryes, thecoloryes, TCY, Lucy, Nyssa, moonchild94, and others, but they're really more or less not important.

I'm (currently) seventeen, and the first thing you should know about me is that I'm a complete Anglophile. My Scottish Keyboard-Pal on fanfiction.net awarded me the title of Honourary Brit. I have no idea what it means exactly, either, but I like to boast about it ;)

On the subject of my creative endeavours, I have plenty. I've been reading religiously since I was about seven, writing stories since I was about eight, writing fanfiction since I was about twelve, pretending I have the skill to make banners since about the same age, watching Doctor Who/Torchwood/a few other brilliant BBC shows since I was about fourteen, and been mental since about... well... I could blame it on the concussion I got when I was eight, or my mates who are just as... unusual, shall we say, as I am, or blame some combination of the two, but who wants to blame when it's so much fun?

And, I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are mad.

Why not the colour no?

If you're here, I'm about 65% certain that you have, at one time or another, wondered why on earth I use the name "thecolouryes" (or the American spelling) as my username on just about everything. The answer, in fact, comes from all the way back in 8th grade. (Wow. I'm finally so old that 8th grade feels like a while ago.) Back then, I was close friends with a few people who would get together after school once a week in the art room and mess around with the art teacher's supplies. One day, I was hanging out with them there and playing with paints and mixing colours and things. When one of my friends asked me what colour the weird mixture of paints that was somewhere like "dark puke green" (imagine the green-ness of puke, only much darker so it's not an awful colour), I answered "yes" because that was my default answer to things, especially when they weren't yes or no questions. And thus, "the colour yes" was born. Somewhere along the way, I decided to start using it for all of my usernames, and it's stuck. If you see anything to the effect of "the colour yes", it's more than likely me.